(Editor’s note: Starting immediately, FLW Tour pro Tom Redington has agreed to make regular blog contributions to FLWOutdoors.com. Bass-fishing fans will be able to see Redington’s blog installments approximately once a month on FLWOutdoors.com. Going forward, fans of FLWOutdoors.com will be treated to a wide array of blogs from a host of different FLW Tour pros as we get closer to the start of the 2014 season.)
As the college football season winds down, blowhards and “know-it-alls” opine on the merits of young men’s ability to play on Sundays, sizing them up like a county fair judge trying to pick a grand champion steer. But what if bass were eligible for the pro football draft? I suspect the scouting report for our finny friends might read something like this:
Northern strain largemouth
Size: 21” Weight: 3.4 lbs 40 Time: 4.6 sec Bench press reps: 10 Vertical leap: 20”
Pros: Willing participant, has a short season so takes advantage of every opportunity. Doesn’t mind heat or cold, willing to live anywhere.
Cons: You could hope for better but it’s hard to complain with five of them on the team. Big frame but a bit skinny. Sure wish it would eat and fill out more. Huge head, not sure if any helmets will fit?
Florida strain largemouth
Size: 25” Weight: 10.8 lbs 40 Time: 4.8 sec Bench press reps: 28 Vertical leap: 21”
Pros: A surefire No. 1 pick. Many would give up everything to have one like this. A rare combination of extreme size, raw strength and an explosive burst to finish off opponents.
Cons: Always eating everything except what you want them to eat. Pretty muscled now but as its belly grows ever larger, will it eat itself out of the league? Only suited for southern teams, will not even think about playing for a full week if it gets cold. Big mouth, definitely a trash talker.
Size: 19” Weight: 3.0 lbs 40 Time: 4.28 sec Bench press reps: 16 Vertical leap: 41”
Pros: Lightning in a bottle – outrageous mix of speed, power, and leaping ability. Nothing like it when they show up.
Cons: A classic coach killer – shows up spectacularly in practice but often nowhere to be found on game day. Nasty disposition and discipline issues likely. Ran the 40-yard dash in record time, but then tried to fight the guy recording his time, knocked over all the orange cones and then tried to eat several smaller participants.
Coosa River spotted bass
Size: 18” Weight: 2.9 lbs 40 Time: 4.32 sec Bench press reps: 18 Vertical leap: 38”
Pros: A genetic freak like the smallmouth combining a scintillating combo of speed, pulling power and jumping; but much more reliable on game day.
Cons: Often too strong for its own good. Takes a very experienced coach to rein in this elite player, often requiring too much finesse to handle all of its power. A bit of a prima donna: requires an environment that has ideal conditions for it. Has been suspended before and frequently will again in the future.
Kentucky spotted bass
Size: 12” Weight: 1.0 lbs 40 Time: 5.2 sec Bench press reps: 3 Vertical leap: 11”
Pros: Plentiful, pretty easy to find a bunch of kids like this to fill your roster. Ready to play just about all the time. Five of these sure beat an empty roster.
Cons: A bunch of these on your team and you’ll be mediocre at best in all but the most extreme cases. Not too bright, known to be released by a team and then hook on with another team the next day, often right where he was released.
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